Tag Archives: Fatherhood

The BeDADitudes: 8 Ways to Be an Awesome Dad

Pope Francis has called Jesus’ Beatitudes our “guide on the path of Christian life.” Of course, as the Incarnation shows, God leads by example. In addition to being a call to Christian discipleship, the Beatitudes could be said to also reveal something about the ways God the Father relates to us, his children. Seen in this light, the Beatitudes present a unique opportunity for Christian men to become fathers after the Father’s own heart.

That’s why I wrote The BeDADitudes: 8 Ways to Be an Awesome Dad, which looks at how the 8 Beatitudes can be understood to shed light on a uniquely Christian vision of masculinity, in general, and fatherhood, in particular.

Want to be an awesome dad? Here’s a sample of how the 8 Beatitudes can help you be the father God is calling you to be.

1. Blessed Are Dads Who Are Poor In Spirit

Seek to be a father after THE Father’s own heart.

Being a dad is on-the-job training. No one has it figured out. Don’t pretend YOU do. Go to God every day. Ask him to teach you to be the husband and father HE wants you to be, and the husband and father your wife and children NEED you to be.

2. Blessed Are The Dads Who Mourn

Be not afraid of feelings. Empathize with your family’s tears, fears, and struggles.

In Scripture, “mourning” doesn’t mean “be sad” so much as it means “cultivate a compassionate heart.” It is not your job to fix or feel judged by your wife’s or kids’ feelings. It is your job to be present to your wife and kids, to understand why they feel as they do, to show that you care, and to help them work through their feelings in godly ways

3. Blessed Are The Dads Who Are Meek

Meekness isn’t weakness. Cultivate the humble strength of a listening heart.

A real leader listens first. The father who is authentically meek is not afraid to hear what his wife and children really need from him and, when necessary, doesn’t hesitate to get new skills to meet those needs.

4. Blessed Are The Dads Who Hunger And Thirst For Righteousness

Awesome dads are on a mission from God. Live for Him. Lead your family to Him.

Research shows that when dads take the lead in prayer, faith formation, and character training, kids are exponentially more likely to live the Catholic faith and values as adults. Be the father that leads your family to THE Father.

5. Blessed Are The Dads Who Are Merciful

Be a loving mentor in your home. Don’t break hearts. Mold them.

Don’t be “The Punisher.” Be a mentor and teacher. Treat your children with respect. Don’t just yell or impose consequences when they mess up . Instead, teach them how to meet their needs and express themselves in good and godly ways.

6. Blessed Are the Dads Who Are Pure in Heart

Cherish the treasure of your wife and children. Protect their dignity. Affirm their worth.

Pope St. John Paul the Great taught that the opposite of love is use. Love makes people more people-y. Use makes people into things or tools. Of course, it’s important to avoid pornography and lustful behavior, both of which are tremendously objectifying, but purity of heart means avoiding all the ways we treat other people as objects. Don’t treat your wife or kids as the “things” that exist to make YOUR life easier. Set the standard for loving service in your home.

7. Blessed Are the Dads Who Are Peacemakers

Keep your house in order. Prioritize your family. Protect the heart of your home.

St. Augustine said, “Peace is the tranquility of right order.” Be the hands-on dad that makes sure your household is respectful, generous, and orderly.

8. Blessed Are the Dads Who Are Persecuted for the Sake Of Righteousness.

The world will try to undermine your effort to be an awesome dad. Be one anyway.

When your friends, family-of-origin, co-workers, or employers try to make you sacrifice what’s best for your family for what they want, choose your family and know that God the Father will honor your sacrifice.

To discover more great ideas for becoming a father after the Father’s heart, check out The BeDADitudes: 8 Ways to Be an Awesome Dad (AveMariaPress).

About the author
Dr. Greg Popcak is the author of many books and the host of More2Life Radio airing weekdays at 10am E on SiriusXM130. For more information on Catholic counseling and other resources, visit www.CatholicCounselors.com

When Dad Is a Fan

I can always tell when my husband is on the phone with his dad. He stops whatever he is doing, walks outside and starts smiling in anticipation of his dad’s latest joke. My father-in-law just survived his third heart attack but continues to enjoy life and see the humor in it all. What a blessing to have a father who, after riding the waves of life with his children, emerges with a smile. Fathers do that. They bring levity to the weight of daily living.

It’s widely held that children formulate the image of their heavenly father based on their relationship with their earthly fathers. So, in 1989 when our oldest was about six and Bart Simpson made his TV series debut, I banned the show from our house. Recently, our oldest son asked, “Mom, why didn’t you want us to watch Bart Simpson?”

Homer, Bart’s dad, was always messing up and treated as an incompetent buffoon. I answered my son, “You have a wonderful dad. You and your three brothers are probably going to be fathers someday so how would planting those seeds benefit four impressionable minds?”

Fathers are unique in their parenting styles but similar in the fact that they are like foundations of homes; they hold up, hold together and keep the family safe from whatever life throws at them. Interestingly, like a foundation, the powerful role they play is sometimes hidden from view.

Growing up in the 60’s, my mom was the “coach” of our family and somehow managed the seven kids, three pets and a full time job. My dad was her best friend, devoted partner and “the team’s” ultimate fan.

As teenagers, Mom would review the curfew rules before we left the house. After she had laid down the law, we’d head toward the front door to leave. Dad would walk over to us and whisper, “Remember. Call me anytime. I will pick you up. No questions asked.” Although he consistently supported “the coach” we always knew he had our backs.

As a mother of four sons, I’ve spent years warming bleachers while spectating a variety of athletes. In my humble opinion, the one that most closely compares to the life of a father is a soccer player.

Regardless of the weather, he shows up. In preparation for the game, he puts on his shin guards because he knows protecting himself from injury is a good idea. No matter where the ball is, he pays attention to the whole field and anticipates the next play. He is a team player and readily offers encouragement. When on offense he has a goal in mind. When on defense, he protects and defends. He is quick on his feet and skillful. He runs for 90 minutes and on many occasions never scores a goal. This does not defeat him because he knows it’s not the individual, it is the team that matters. Win or lose, he shakes hands, goes home and gets ready for the next game.

Recently, I’ve noticed that our sons call their dad’s cell twice as much as they call mine. I’m learning to put away my whistle and get out my pom-poms. As young men, they no longer need a coach. They are much better served by a steadfast, accessible and encouraging fan.

“Courageous” Movie Offers Powerful Message About Fatherhood

Are you looking for a new movie with a compelling message and action-packed police drama? Then check out “Courageous,” which opens around the country on September 30.

Sherwood Pictures produced the film, following up on the success of an earlier release, “Fireproof.” Unique among production companies, Sherwood Pictures is a ministry of Sherwood Baptist Church in Albany, Georgia. The actors are volunteers, drawn mostly from the church’s ministry. Most of them, especially the leads, turn in professional performances worthy of a mainstream production.

“Courageous” tells the story of four law enforcement officers who bravely face the worst the streets have to offer. At home, however, they’re falling short as dads. One nags his son and brushes off his daughter; another is divorced and hardly sees his child; a third fathered a daughter when he was young and then walked away. It takes a personal tragedy, and more, to help these men recognize and accept their responsibilities as Christian fathers.

Although set in an evangelical Christian context, the film’s message about the importance of fatherhood will resonate with people of all faiths. The filmmakers are encouraging individuals, small groups, and faith communities to use the movie as a springboard to discussion and practical application of its message.

More information and resources are available on the Courageous website.